Whether it’s your first date or the two of you have been together for awhile, make sure you don’t do any of these activities, which some of our African American Matchmaking members have listed as their pet peeves–extremely annoying and irritating behavior that they can’t stand:
Using words when you don’t know what they mean
Trying to finish my story for me or guess what I am trying to say
According to Forbes author Michelle Crawley, marketers could use her ten tips to be better marketers. In the same way, when dating and loving another person, we could do it better if we listen more carefully:
Stop talking. If you want to hear what someone has to say, you have to be silent.
Block out the distractions and really concentrate on what the other person is telling you. Don’t let your mind wander.
Fine-tune your senses. You can glean a lot of information from tone, delivery, body language and surroundings.
Maintain eye contact.
Really hear what the person is saying, instead of thinking ahead about how you are going to respond or about how you’ve had a similar experience. It’s not about you.
Instead of taking notes, just listen—carefully.
Repeat back some of the points you are hearing to verify and clarify.
Ask open-ended questions because these elicit a more descriptive response.
Give cues—both visual and auditory—that you are following what the other person is saying.